Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
One of my friends took me out last night for a bday celebration and I just now remembered that a man blew fire balls across the bar in honor of my birthday... How drunk do you have to be to forget that?
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
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I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
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