either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
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