? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
I went 670% over budget on my vacation. My accountant would flip if he weren't me.
How the fuck do you have so much free time?
Polyphasic sleep schedule.
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
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