dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
did i just pee glitter
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
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