Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
