Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
She is a social worker. An actual good person trying to save the world. I feel like every time I give her an orgasm God wipes a little smudge off of my shit list.
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
