i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
im about as happy as oj after his trial
So my Christmas cards this year will be my mug shot with my kids face photo shopped next to me....too ghetto?
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
There's some band that practices next door to my apartment. I'm thinking we may need to check that out. I could be like, "Hey boys, thought you might like some lemonade and vagina."
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
Randomize
