i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
Randomize
