I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
Randomize
