how could I be having a bad time, I have the three most important things in life: Goat cheese, Xanax, and Saved By the Bell Re-runs.
I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
Randomize
