Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
I just heard myself say the sentence "I'm gonna go to the bank then take a nap". 8 year old me just slapped my present self through the space-time continuum for being an old fuck.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
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