I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car.
You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car?
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
Hey can you tell Daniel there's a bottle of Captain Morgan's in the dryer ...
Sorry I think you have the wrong number
Yes it looks like I do
Randomize
