she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
He couldn't undo my bra. He ended up breaking the clasp he clawed at it so long. We met on Tinder for God sake
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
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