Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
Randomize
