How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
Randomize
