Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize