Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
Randomize
