Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
So much rum. So many feels.
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
Randomize
