I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
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