32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
This is getting exciting. I almost wanna turn off all the lights, get some popcorn, and stare at my phone screen to see if she's going to say yes or not
And on a much sadder note, I'm way to drunk for this right now
Randomize
