I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
He told me they were just razor bumps!
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
I just sucked dick on a ferry
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Randomize
