suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
Randomize
