In America we eat man semen.
Dude, I just spun my iPhone on my boner without it falling off. I belong in cirque du soleil.
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
Even my vagina gasped.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
Randomize