i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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