I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
Mom, I'm really sorry you saw my naked ex-boyfriend in the living room this morning. I can explain....but I'd rather just stick with this apology and be done with it
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
Randomize