is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
Randomize
