Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
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