I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
Randomize
