I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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