I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
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She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
Yeah, I only wore tennis shoes under the gown. Way cooler than khakis and a shirt, but much more awkward when my parents wanted to go to dinner immediately after the ceremony and my grandmother started to unzip the gown. Stopped her before it was too late, but barely. My dad just rolled his eyes.
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
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