Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
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