you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
Randomize
