the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
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