I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
If I get one more "oh yaaaaa he changed your oil" texts, I'm gonna lose my shit
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
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