If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
Randomize
