Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
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