You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
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