I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
Randomize
