ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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