her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
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