we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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