I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
Randomize
