How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
Randomize
