Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
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