Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
