Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
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