Texts From Last Night

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  (714): View more from California

  I discovered last night there is no graceful way to remove your face from your gf's crotch when your parents walk in the room

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  (714): I discovered last night there is no graceful way to remove your face from your gf's crotch when your parents walk in the room http://tfl.nu/2egq
  Replies (50) Good night (1689) Bad night (8191)
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  (281): View more from Texas

  i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets

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  (281): i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets http://tfl.nu/eja8
  Replies (33) Good night (7568) Bad night (720)
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  (253): View more from Washington

  Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.

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  (253): Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs. http://tfl.nu/k3j3
  Replies (13) Good night (1398) Bad night (3567)
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  (409): View more from Texas

  Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.

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  (409): Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever. http://tfl.nu/fjfv
  Replies (12) Good night (961) Bad night (4159)
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life

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  (617): Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life http://tfl.nu/020c
  Replies (11) Good night (1163) Bad night (4358)
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  (312): View more from Illinois

  the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.

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  (312): the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building. http://tfl.nu/d9kx
  Replies (29) Good night (4416) Bad night (1563)
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  (518): View more from New York

  I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth

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  (518): I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth http://tfl.nu/kl4h
  Replies (20) Good night (7606) Bad night (1136)
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  (480): View more from Arizona

  i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone

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  (480): i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone http://tfl.nu/s959
  Replies (12) Good night (6418) Bad night (1562)
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  (317): View more from Indiana

  Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.

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  (317): Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good. http://tfl.nu/7ot5
  Replies (2) Good night (3301) Bad night (862)
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha

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  (610): We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha http://tfl.nu/f3qb
  Replies (4) Good night (1650) Bad night (627)
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  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.

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  (+44): made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012. http://tfl.nu/7rf8
  Replies (8) Good night (2097) Bad night (616)
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  (917): View more from New York City

  Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.

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  (917): Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets. http://tfl.nu/ksjf
  Replies (10) Good night (911) Bad night (1627)
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  (905): View more from Ontario

  I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward

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  (905): I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward http://tfl.nu/lq2w
  Replies (18) Good night (1440) Bad night (623)
• Favorite

  (614): View more from Ohio

  We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"

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  (614): We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us" http://tfl.nu/w1ue
  Replies (1) Good night (1196) Bad night (447)
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  (503): View more from Oregon

  He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up

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  (503): He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up http://tfl.nu/b7lo
  Replies (1) Good night (498) Bad night (338)

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