Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
John Mayer's mother should have swallowed him when she had the chance.
As in blowjob or cannibalism?
I was thinking blowjob, but either would've been a better idea than giving him a record deal.
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
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