I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
I'm eating tomato paste and drinking banana juice that is expired. Can we please get groceries tonight?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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