i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
Randomize
