i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
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