Moan for me like Helen Keller
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
Do vagina's smell?
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
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