Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
I'm officially "accidentally set myself on fire" drunk
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
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